I'm taking a poll: Is It Possible To Get Too Much Sleep?
Last night I retired around 10 p.m. I wanted to go to sleep much earlier, but out of rebellion against turning in during the hated 8 o'clock bedtime hour of my youth, I rolled around on the internet until a respectable, more adult bedtime drew near.
I then proceeded to sleep HARD, despite a few REM-cycle interruptions. First, I woke up around 2 a.m. as one of my roommates was banging around the kitchen for a while. I woke up again around 5, too hot, so I got up to turn up my air conditioner. I again awoke at 6:20, when my alarm went off, used the facilities, and then returned to bed, where I remained until 8 a.m., when I FINALLY found the motivation to drag my lazy ass out of bed.
Folks, that's a LOT of sleep. That's more than TWICE what I usually get. I normally walk around in a crazed, manic state of sleep-deprivation which, though inconvenient and certainly not a boon to my appearance, has somehow up to this point worked out for me.
Or has it?
I'm beginning to wonder.
I'm in a bit of a fog today. I feel like my brain is still reposed. Really, I just want to go home and continue sleeping. I DID have my iced coffee this morning, of course, but I noticed no tangible shift in alertness. Even on my WORST sleep-deprived mornings, the iced coffee would give me a little pep. But today - nothing!
I'll have to do an experiment regarding this matter, clearly. First, I'll need a lunchtime iced coffee. After that, I will once again guage my energy level. Is it possible to have slept almost 9 hours and be immune to TWO iced coffees, simply because the caffeine is unnecessary?
One thing's for certain: I'm not sure I like the World of the Well-Rested. It's scary to me. I don't know if I can live in a world where my dependency on coffee is rendered obsolete. Please, coffee...PLEASE crack me out this afternoon and prove me wrong!
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2 comments:
I have, myself, noticed many of these effects that you mention: alertness after not much sleep, sluggishness after too much or "the proper amount of" sleep, etc. It has led me to one incredible and terrifying conclusion: sleep is a myth. We only sleep because we are conditioned to do so by ghosts and aliens who, as we all know, like to do the bulk of their work in the evenings. In fact, the Ghost and Alien Lobby is one of the most powerful in Washington D.C. (third after the NRA and, curiously, People for Angel Food Cake) and their influence has resulted in some amusing legislature and accepted customs. Did you know, for example, that it is illegal to deny a paranormal entity homemade apple fritters if they ask for it? It's right there in the law books, folks.
"It has led me to one incredible and terrifying conclusion: sleep is a myth."
Agreed! This must be why I fight it so often! Something in me just knoooows...
"Did you know, for example, that it is illegal to deny a paranormal entity homemade apple fritters if they ask for it?"
I did know this, since the ghost of my dog, Shags, was part of the class-action lawsuit that actually precluded this legislation.
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